Bowser needs Peach to breastfeed his children

[https://youtu.be/1uDQ8mTYUHQ](https://youtu.be/1uDQ8mTYUHQ)

We know from this video that in the world of Mario, drinking milk gives magical growth powers and enhances the drinker’s strength.

Have you ever noticed a distinct lack of farm animals in the Mario games? It seems that in the main timeline, something catastrophic happened to the dairy industry. The most dairy ever featured in the main timeline that I can think of were the 11 sheep in Super Mario Odyssey, 6 of which were well protected in Mushroom Kingdom territory. Milk would be a luxury in the main timeline due to the scarcity of farm creatures. Toads don’t lactate, Shy Guys don’t lactate, Koopas don’t lactate, and goombas don’t lactate.

However, there is an exception in some of the spin-offs. You see in Mario Kart Wii that dairy farms like Moo Moo Meadows are flourishing, and in Mario Kart Tour, we can see German Luigi holding a sausage which presumably is made of beef. None of the Paper Mario games are canonical, so I won’t discuss their markets or diets. Mario Golf World Tour has plenty of sheep; Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games takes place in the real world where the dairy industry is fine; Luigi’s Mansion has featured cheese on multiple occasions; Mario Party 2 features Western Land where 4 bottles of milk can be purchased for a total of 20 coins; et cetera. What do all these games have in common? Bowser doesn’t kidnap peach.

Bowser wants his children to grow and become stronger, and in the main timeline, he can’t use the power stars since he has only ever acquired 7 grand stars in his entire career (not enough to accommodate himself and 8 children). He can’t use mushrooms, because those don’t work on the Koopalings (Super Mario Maker 2 isn’t canon). The only way he can boost the strength of his children is using milk. In the spin-offs, he can just buy the milk legally; Bowser’s Kingdom is at peace. In the main timeline, though, Bowser has to resort to kidnapping Peach and forcing her to breastfeed his children. Princess Peach’s precious breast milk helps his children to become more powerful, just like what happened to Mario when he raided those kids’ refrigerator.

Remember the fan comic of Bowsette? In the original fan comic, Bowser acquires the super crown and immediately turns away from his evil deeds, his murdering and kidnapping replaced by joking and teasing. That’s because in the Bowsette fanon timeline, Bowsette has breasts, and he can breastfeed his children himself. Bowser can become the mother they never had.

Now I know what you’re thinking: Peach can’t lactate because she doesn’t have children! That’s not true: the photographic evidence is right here:

[https://www.deviantart.com/remmpon/art/Princess-Peach-milking-a-baby-141232643](https://www.deviantart.com/remmpon/art/Princess-Peach-milking-a-baby-141232643)

Can Bowsette lactate? She is actually a reptile transformed into a humanoid, but it seems that she can:

[https://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/strangehero/bowsette-feeds-peach](https://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/strangehero/bowsette-feeds-peach)

I don’t know if there was something I missed, but it seems clear to me that the developers and writers were at least alluding to Peach breastfeeding Bowser’s children.

TL;DR: Bowser needs Peach to breastfeed his children, but hey, that’s just a theory, a Game Theory!